You make the songs listenable again :)

I still remember the long period of time I used up to regain myself after I ended my first relationship. Although I suggested the breakup, it still took me several months to heal, to get over the fact that
1) I no longer had him
2) Should no longer expect him to feel the same for me
3) Therefore had no one to love me back
4) Am no longer in a privileged position - being in a relationship
5) And am not able to enjoy life as one who's in a relationship is able to.

The feeling of being alone, lonesome, was painful, and there were a lot of times that I'd just spontaneously cry or have my emotions fluctuated wildly, no longer the calm and patient person I used to be. I mistreated and required help from a lot of people around me and here I wish to once again express my thanks for those whose helped me through the hard times.
And I'll have to thank you too, for giving me this valuable lesson in life.

Now I've found my way out. Very recently I've gotten myself hurled up in another one of these crazy crushes, as those who've read my previous few posts may have seen...
I hope this one's actually going to get somewhere, and not like those many others where I've exposed my position as an admirer much too often. I'll remain silent for these two years, until the last day of year 13.

It's amazing how happy you could get me to be - I know I'm hyper-sensitive, and you might not even mean to give me the feelings I get, but its around you when my cheeks flush apple-red, am especially conscious of my appearance, trying to not make a fool out of myself (only to become more of one), and stutter when I get looked into the eye by you for more than a minute.

The songs that I've deleted from my phone because I decided that they were too painful to listen to, I would now reload them back onto my playlist. Watching couples stroll by, I no longer long for the old days, instead, I hope for the near future, a future where you and I would be there for others to stand in my current position and envy :]

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In other words, other than having failed my math test, you've managed to brighten up my day without too much of an effort. Just like that, at the top of the morning, working your magic like you always do.

- <3 Bee

Hello earthlings,

my poor soul shall depart from my flesh during periods four and five (11:00am - 12:30pm) on Monday the 18th of February, 2008
Yes, while I'm taking my math test.
I'm confident this one is going to be so hard it'll blow me away.
If in the case that does happen, this very post shall be my last one.
I have lived my life and I have no regrets.

Goddammit all I want is some luck so I could pass the test, that's all I want, really - x -"
since judging from my progress with trying to study, I'm more likely to fail than ever.

Math, especially "completing the frickin' square", is an ass.

)(*&^%$#@!#$%^%&^%@

- <3 Bee

Come, let me sing into your ear;
Those dancing days are gone,
All that silk and satin gear;
Crouch upon a stone,
Wrapping that foul body up
In as foul a rag:
I carry the sun in a golden cup.
The moon in a silver bag.

For some unknown reason, I'm finding the lyrics to the song 'Those Dancing Days Are Gone' by Carla Bruni (which was originally a poem by Yeats titled the same name) highly attractive. Perhaps it was the way she sung it, the laid back style, the whisper-y voice in combination with the distinctive accents. Its been stuck in my head for the past week.

Go have a listen if you have time.
Another recommendation are the music videos by Kings of Convenience.
I love that duo.

have a nice day,
(yes, while I have to face up with my math quiz at the very start of the morning, all before the holidays begin)

- Bee <3