The True Value

As seen, I've just been through yet another wave of bother in life,
But I won't linger, I'll sail off now.

I'm sure everyone's heard sayings beginning with "Life's too short..." and then continuing with a bunch of extraordinary tasks that are to be carried out because life would be dull without these certain impulsive aspects. I don't think I could agree to it anymore, its no longer a motto or way of life I value; bold is no longer beautiful. I treasure the ordinary, the simple. Whether you're the visualist, audist, or literate, the aesthetic goal is achieved through the introduction of balance between forms for that is what gives us comfort while any excess or shortage would banish the path to this goal.

What I meant to say is that, a good life doesn't necessarily need to be as thrilling and full of ups and downs like a roller coaster, but the gentle dips into the flow of the ocean currents when a ship is on smooth sail resembles the pattern in the emotional journey of a good life better than any other.

Ordinary is beautiful.

Its never occurred to me that you ought to be shared.
What is this all, why now?
Although I couldn't manage to say it in your face, I'll do so now, here.

Dad, I know how long you've been looking forward to this,
the past eighteen years, each progressively just making you realise more and more how lonesome single life could be, how fruitless life could get 'without child' (since I'm with mom)...
but after all these years of seeing you with your various beaus,
It seemed perfectly natural to me that you'll have bedside company,
but taking this all in an instant is hard to digest.

Is this all in perfect timing or what,
I'm leaving for school next year,
and the newborn will be here by the time I graduate,
here, a replacement?
Its not like our relationship has remained strong,
especially in the past few years,
this is oil slick poured on a highway when I'm a car with screwed up breaks,
a catalyst for a cancer,
while in hopes that this new addition would not shred whats left of us apart,
I know this is exactly what it'll do.
Actually - never mind me.

I hope to never be dependent of you again,
and I'll try hard, starting from now,
to aim to be out standing.
You, and your 'family' shall watch me succeed,
lead a splendid life,
I will do anything to avoid pleading at your feet for help,
and I will pay you back with what you've given.
My earlier years, all that you've given me,
trust me,
they're all appreciated,
even now.

Tell you what, its just your attitude that I'm sick of,
and your lack of order in life.

Finally, good luck with whatever's ahead,
I wish you great happiness, an eternity if there is one, in your marriage.
The child, bless it, hopefully the reverse of me, abiding, obedient and intellectual.


-- as for I, I'll stay strong.

I am 17, going on 18...
innocent as a rose?

Year 2008, you're about to come to an end soon anyway, why give me this shit now, as if the year hasnt been bad enough on its own. Well, when I look back in the future, you're sure to be full of excitement.

Dad, between you and I, I think I've taken the privilege of being your other half in our family relationship for granted much too long, that I never realised the possibility of you reaching out again. Frankly, to be honest, I can't believe its happening, all in such short notice, all happening so soon. This is 'The Ballad of Jack and Rosie" in everyday life.

While I'm not skeptical of what you've planned ahead, I certainly don't like the way you've laid things out for me. "I'm sorry you're the last person to know", is that the best you could do, seriously!?

I will get through this.

Welcome home, my Edelweiss Special Edition Diana F+ Camera

:)

I daren't waste my film indoors, but I'll take it everywhere with me from now onwards, especially on bright sunny days.
Doesn't it feel great to treat yourself to something once in a while, especially having undergone something? For me, I've just passed through EE week, spending a whole week writing something that resembles research papers in university. Tough it may seem now, but I know it won't be long that I'll look back and laugh at the naivety of all this.

Something else to make a note of is my week-old eye infection: looks like it'd take a bit more time before it would die off.

Anyhow, I'm braindead from having written so much in the past few days, deeply sorry for submitting in a messy paragraph.

I can't wait to develop my first roll of film :]

- Bee

Amy Winehouse, Stand Strong!

Given that this one thing is of great value,
I tend to find it extremely heartbreaking to watch it turn bad,
even if it does not directly relate to me,
and I wouldn't get any good out of it...

Amy Winehouse,
you're one of the few artists round this time with all the talents an artist could hope for
what you put on stage are amazing,
but the scandalous life you lead offstage is not quite as impressive,
degrading too, some would call it.
While your situation may not exactly be the easiest to get through,
please live on strong and turn away from the bad asap,
we need you.

- from one of the billions of people on earth who love your music, and you.

<3